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 Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!

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Katrin Lynn

Katrin Lynn

Posts : 109
Join date : 2014-02-17
Location : Maryland

PostSubject: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 8:07 am

Haha I have hijacked the lotto this week!!!  As a big thank you to everyone for doing this these past weeks, and of course to give Lisa her reprieve, I'd like to shower my lovely guildies with prizes this week.

1st prize: 50 gold, 50 ectos and a handful of random goodies
2nd prize: 25 gold 25 ectos and a few random goodies
3rd prize: 10 gold, 10 ectos and a random goody

Homework time!

To enter, I'd like you to use the following 3 words in a sentence or sentences.

and your choice of Bacon or Tofu Very Happy

It can be 3, unrelated sentences. Or they can all be used in one sentence, or all used in a phrase.

BONUS  Whichever entry makes me laugh the most gets a bonus prize. Myron knows what it is...but it's a surprise for the rest of you

As always, the winners will be selected before guild missions on Sunday.  Good luck!
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Posts : 82
Join date : 2014-12-25
Age : 24
Location : Pennsylvania

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 9:18 am

Wanna know a way to make bacon taste bad? First, put the bacon in a crockpot. Then, grab a portable CD player, put it next to the crockpot, and play some Hayseed Dixie for as long as the bacon is cooking in the crockpot. When it's all done cooking, try a piece of the cooked bacon. I guarantee it will be the foulest, most disgusting thing you have ever tasted in your life. And, since we all know, bacon is ALWAYS good, this foul/and or disgusting bacon will cause a rip in the space/time continuum, ending the universe as we know it. So don't try this at home, kids! Very Happy

Last edited by Bluelaguna on Thu Feb 26, 2015 9:32 am; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : Emote wasn't showing up)
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Posts : 3
Join date : 2014-10-10
Age : 22
Location : CANADA!! AYYY

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 9:44 am

When I was younger back on the farm you see, Mama always use to say, "Honey Bear, if you want yourself some fine bacon, Y'all gotta throw it into a crockpot, yea see just like Pas homemade roadkill soup; But the secret ingredient dear child is to bath it in our saviors Hayseed Dixies beautiful melodies. And that son is how you make bacon." Words of wisdom, yea see here Mama won first place a few year back with her Hayseed Crockpot Bacon at the county fair, Pa said it was her greatest life achievement.
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Posts : 1260
Join date : 2011-08-31
Age : 60
Location : North Carolina

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 11:07 am

Is it ok if I submit a limerick?

*clears throat*

A tong weilding woman named Karen
Told us her bacon wasn't for sharing
But Hayseed Dixie was played
And the guild staged a raid
now at her empty crockpot she is staring

Do I get bonus points for using tongs too? Razz
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Posts : 35
Join date : 2012-12-22

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 3:39 pm

After watching Hayseed Dixie pour some sugar on me video,
I try to remove the mental scarring by grabbing a crockpot and smashing it into my face repeatedly!
To then try recover from the damage I'd done to my face, I ate some proper British bacon(none of your streaky bacon rubbish),
worked like a charm.

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Posts : 45
Join date : 2014-09-19
Age : 33
Location : Toronto, Canada

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 3:43 pm

" With an evil chortle Myron adds another block of Hayseed Dixie to the Radio set list. Leaning back in his chair, he meticulously stirs his glass of rum with a single piece of candied bacon. As the block of music begins to play, the threats begin to flood the guild chat; leaning forward he reads outloud. . . .

Romulus Of Krank
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Posts : 133
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 27

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 3:49 pm

Listening to Hayseed Dixie makes me want to fill a Crockpot with Tofu and dunk my head in it to help muffle the noise!
Also, Bacon.

Lol wonderful idea Karen!! <3
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Posts : 103
Join date : 2014-04-15
Age : 33
Location : Milwaukee

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 3:58 pm

A sick note for you:

Dear Children,
Mommy Tongs has come down with baconitis and tofever. Allow 6-8 weeks of rest. During this time she may not use the crockpot.

Thank you,
Dr. Hayseed
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kitt knighthawke

kitt knighthawke

Posts : 141
Join date : 2012-07-10
Age : 57
Location : jackson, tenn

PostSubject: Kitt Knighthawke   Wed Feb 25, 2015 3:59 pm

One beautiful Friday evening Myron is played Hayseed on his streams while Strixie is running around throwing tofu at everyone and brad is chasing her threatening her with bacon. In comes Officer Murff witnessing all the mayhem, he promptly shouts "Arrest Mode!" You people must cease and desist!,at which Betty sneaks up behind him and steals his robo helm and replaces it with a crock pot and dashes off across Lion's Arch chiming Officer McCrockpot!, Officer McCrockpot!,with Murff in tow shouting BETTY!

Kitt Phantom
Kitt Evergreen

Have A Blessed Day sunny
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Posts : 335
Join date : 2010-07-09
Age : 28
Location : Austin, Texas

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 4:09 pm

There was once a boy named Hayseed Dixie, he had a pet crockpot named Officer McCrockpot. He loves to cook with it using a special pair of carbon fiber tongs that was gifted to him by a wandering merchant named "Dances with Tongs". The merchant wanders up and down the freeway clanking and clanging with all of his tongs was known well by the people. People thought he was crazy but no one appreciate more than Hayseed. Hayseed loved the tongs so much that he wish to share his enjoyment with his mother who would often use them to grab bacon off of the frying pan. His mother also loved the tongs, "it is so smooth and slick and it doesn't melt when expose to high heat like the cheapo plastic tongs, she exclaimed!" Hayseed was glad that his mother also enjoy the wonders of the tongs. One day, while he was flipping through a cooking magazine, he noticed a white blocky substance called "tofu". He was excited to try out various new and exotic ingredients to cook in his crockpot with. The next day, he went to the store to grab some tofu and while he was there, he met a rude old man named Myron the Grey, who stocks the store shelves. Myron noticed that Hayseed was going to buy tofu and immediately sought to discourage Hayseed from buying it. Myron stated that tofu tasted like cardboard and suggest that Hayseed should eat more manly stuff like bacon, however Hayseed paid no heed to the senile old man and continue on his way home with his purchased tofu. When he was finally home, he flipped through the magazine once more to remind him of the fantastic recipe that he found called Miso Soup. He quickly prep the crockpot and the other ingredients in preparation for making the soup. He gently used his tongs to carefully add the ingredients and turn the crockpot to on. Hours, later, he could smell the fanstic aroma that was spewing out into the kitchen. His mother also was quick to notice the powerful aroma and question what it was. Hayseed explained that it was Miso Soup and they were both excited to try it out. Upon first taste, they both looked at each other and in agreement thought that the soup was the best thing ever and the tofu was nice and tender and tasted fantastic. I never knew that something so simple like tofu tasted so good, shouted Hayseed. From that point on, they both agree to at least make miso soup at least once a week. As for the senile old man, some say that alligators infiltrated his shack in the swamp and ate him.
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Posts : 597
Join date : 2013-06-16
Age : 38
Location : San Diego

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 7:14 pm

*hopes the mystery prize is Karen's goodies*


I'd like to put both Tofu and Hayseed Dixie into a Crockpot full of kittens and throw it into the ocean. And then cover Karen with Bacon and mind.

Thank you, Karen. I love you
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Posts : 5
Join date : 2015-02-03

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Wed Feb 25, 2015 8:03 pm

Little boys are made of snips, snails and puppy dog tails. Tea cup piggies are made of Bacon (of course), Tofu & Hayseeds all swirled around in a crockpot.

Mmmmm... Bacon.

IGN: Princess Kai
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Posts : 346
Join date : 2010-06-27
Age : 104
Location : scotland

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Thu Feb 26, 2015 3:19 am

i know a lot of guildies want ascended bacon  heres what you do  
1st you get a large crockpot place your bacon in it then get a rare  recording of a hayseed dixie song place it next too the crockpot and play it non stop for 8 hours and as if by magic you have        ascended bacon
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Abby Light Moon

Abby Light Moon

Posts : 63
Join date : 2014-06-18
Location : Earth

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Thu Feb 26, 2015 3:46 pm

There was a crockpot that was listening to Hayseed Dixie and eating some bacon. When he was eating the bacon he barfed and tried tofu instead. THE END!
Abby or Slinet Light Moin
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Posts : 85
Join date : 2014-12-05

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Fri Feb 27, 2015 2:55 pm

Ah Tofu Prince and the Tofu Queen went on a journy to slay the Crockpot Dragon. They used their Legendary Hayseed Swords of Justice to slay the Dragon. And the lived Happily Ever After in their Tofu Castle. The End.
Avuss (ele) or Mini Phantom Force (Mesmer)
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Posts : 20
Join date : 2015-01-04
Location : Canada

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sat Feb 28, 2015 12:22 am

Sizzling bacon with her trusty tongs
Picks up everything, except Myron's thongs
Everytime she hears Hayseed songs,
Banging her head on a crockpot,
The sound of a gong.

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Posts : 120
Join date : 2014-02-09
Age : 22
Location : Canada

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sat Feb 28, 2015 6:41 am

How Do I love thee Bacon? Let me count the ways

3.No Tofu
4. Bacon

Also Be on the Lookout in Guild chat. Myron has been Seeding discontent recently. Officer McCrockpot Can't keep up with all his shenanigans. But Hay! Thats Fine we'll get the old guy yet. Might be Joint Task Force Time....

And By the Way, 12, Blue, Funzies and WHEE!

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Posts : 338
Join date : 2012-08-23
Age : 68
Location : Florida

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sat Feb 28, 2015 7:06 am

Mr. Kotter:

Mali can't be a DJ on sunday becuase we are going on a family trip. The original guild DJ, Brad, who they tell me loves bacon, will do the show. Mali made him promise not to play any songs by Hayseed Dixie. Told him if he does she will make him wear a crockpot on his head for a week.

Epstein's mother

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Posts : 110
Join date : 2014-02-12
Age : 29
Location : Canada

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sat Feb 28, 2015 9:15 am

Stitch asks: How do you make a HAYSEED fan angry?

By stealing their CROCKPOT and leaving them with as lump of TOFU
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Posts : 52
Join date : 2015-01-24
Age : 34
Location : Iowa

PostSubject: Lotto Ending in the Week of March 1st.   Sat Feb 28, 2015 12:31 pm

Gonna eat some Bacon flavored Tofu fresh from the Crockpot out back on the Hayseed's gonna be a fine day!
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Sapling Spruce

Posts : 14
Join date : 2014-04-12

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sat Feb 28, 2015 6:15 pm

After a long day at work, killing dragons and the undead, Spruce finally arrives home. Trying to remember what she threw in the crockpot for dinner. Lifting the lid,it looks like burnt bacon...ugh. Tuning into Anhk radio..oh no! Myron is playing that awful Hayseed Dixie again! Spruce picks up the crockpot and the radio, throwing both out the window. She then settles down with some is good!
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Posts : 5
Join date : 2015-01-04

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sun Mar 01, 2015 10:01 am

Listening to Hayseed Dixie is more fun than saving Myron's bacon when he gets lost during guild rush because he was distracted by a new crockpot gourmet recipe on the Food Network.

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Myrea Rend

Myrea Rend

Posts : 33
Join date : 2014-03-26

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sun Mar 01, 2015 11:49 am

Stop calling me a crockpot, you piece of hayseed bacon.

Officer Murff
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Posts : 9
Join date : 2015-02-08

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sun Mar 01, 2015 2:30 pm

What kind of crockpot would prefer hayseed over tofu?!

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Posts : 4
Join date : 2015-02-28
Age : 62
Location : Houston, Texas

PostSubject: Re: Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!   Sun Mar 01, 2015 2:35 pm

I hope this is the right place to enter the Lotto
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Lotto ending March 1!!!!!!
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